unfocused

I feel like I should be writing a new post. Actually, I want to write a new post. I just can’t focus on anything that’s worth being written.

I had a look through my drafts, but none of them fit my mood. I’m still slightly nauseous – not physically, but in my head – from over-indulging in the wine and limoncello and Cuba Libre and champagne on my grandma’s 86th birthday dinner/party on Wednesday.

I have so much time on my hands, that I cannot fit enough things in to fill up my days. I know that’s a luxury problem, but it’s a problem nonetheless. Time is dripping through my fingers and I don’t know what to do with it. It’s all over the floor at the moment. A bit of a mess, to be honest.

I should be writing my NaNo novel, except that I gave up winning that and started a new story half-way through. I’ll have to write thousands of words every day for the next week if I want to win. I could do it. Maybe I should do it. Maybe I will. Not sure.

Walking the dog in the mornings is fine. There’s clear, crisp, slightly wet air and it wakes me up and clears my head. And there’s things to see, like this:

Or this:

And sometimes this, although not so much anymore, because the leaves are falling rapidly:

Sorry for the total lack of focus on this post. It’s an adequate representation of my mind at the moment.

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About wordsurfer

writer, ex-teacher, human rights believer & fighter, traveller, adventure-seeker, freedom lover, global citizen. big on daydreams, less so on reality.

Posted on November 23, 2012, in day-to-day and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 5 Comments.

  1. I agree that you should be working on the new story, especially since you feel like you should, but don’t let winning be the only goal. Maybe just go for writing some every day, for that feeling that you’ve used the time you have well, for something you want to progress with. You’re only racing with yourself, after all.

    • The hardest race of all… But you’re right, of course. I’d still like to win NaNo though, especially against those odds – sometimes I need to prove to myself that I can do ridiculous stuff (like climb a mountain I’m not prepared for and similar). No matter what, reading about your achievements is a regular source of inspiration! 🙂

      • Winning would be nice, certainly, and an accomplishment, but don’t let that goal get in the way of the more important one: writing in and of itself. And thank you for the compliment. Honest, I’m just trying to do the writing version of walking. Every day, one word after another. Eventually, you get to write the best ones, “The End” and that is an accomplishment every time, no matter how long it takes or how quickly you do it. It’s a killer high, one that doing it 6 times so far hasn’t dimmed even slightly. I’m looking forward to reading about you getting there with this story. Now go bang on the keys for a while, see what comes out. 🙂

  2. Oh my goodness those photos are amazing! I’m a morning writer, but a landscape like that would provide a beautiful distraction.

    NaNo is a funny writing beast; it can pull out a draft, sometimes feeling as if it’s being dragged from my gut through my nostrils- ick (and ouch!). At other times it’s as messy but plentiful as the time in puddles on your floor. It took me ages to garner the inner strength to write; I read your ‘about’, and felt the same, so many characters trying to winnow their way through my perfectionist tendencies. NaNo taught me: don’t think; just write. Many manuscripts later, I am a better writer. But oh so many words fell in the process.

    Anyways, that’s my two cents. And thanks for following my blog! 🙂

    • Thank you for stopping by and for the compliment! The dog isn’t that fond of me taking photos on our walks because then I stop and take my time and shoot several pictures and he just wants to run…! 🙂

      That’s quite a painful picture of getting at a first draft! I appreciate your advice very much – it’s good to know that people go through the same process and still come out successful. The “don’t think” part is hard, but I’m working on ways to trick myself, like getting up very early and starting to write before my brain is awake – it worked this morning, so let’s see if I can carry the momentum past the first coffee!

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